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Long time no blog I know… I’m a bad bad girl… anyhooo…
I’m moving again. I don’t know where I’m going because I don’t actually have anywhere to go, so the plan is to go to Sydney for 3 weeks, look for an apartment to lease while I rent an apartment for 3 weeks and if I can’t find one, then I’ll go to Melbourne maybe. So anyhooo I’m off to Sydney for 3 weeks at this stage.
Which brings me to moooooooooooving. I DESPISE MOVING. I do it every 6 – 9 months and I hate it as much as I hate wasabi. For all of you who are lucky enough to be planted so don’t get it, allow me to take you on a magical journey of moving….
1. what tools to take – look at them all… how can you choose?! I feel naked without them! I can only take a few on the plane due to weight issues and I’m getting everything put into storage, so once they’re in there, it’s going to be next to impossible to get them out. THEN we also have the issue that they don’t fit in a moving box so the removalist can see them. You should see the looks the removalist man gives you if you ask him to pick up 3 boxes of sex toys and stick them on the back of his truck!
2. You’re forced to eat all of your chocolate you’ve been hoarding – my mum posted me these little bunnies for Easter and I’ve been saving them up for a special occasion when I REALLY REALLY needed cheering up. Now I’m forced to gobble them early, BUT because they now have a personal meaning to me, I can’t eat them because they’re like people now so it makes me feel sad!
3. taking stock of your life – the pile of tax crap you have to finally pull out of the drawer that faces you 😦 depressing 😦 I have one of those “tax drawers”. You know the drawer you pull out 2 cm’s so nothing escapes and so you can’t see what’s on the inside that you stick all of your tax crap in? It is the ONLY aspect of my life that is not completely OCD and I NEVER EVER NEVER get manic about.
4. sadness of leaving the rented microwave – if you’ve ever rented and the place came with a microwave, you’ll know egggsactly what I’m on about here. You know when you open a microwave and it stinks like a bachelors microwave i.e a combination of Indian Curry, Pizza and Kebab? It takes a full 9 months of washing it every day and boiling water in it to finally get the stench out and then you have to leave it behind. You finally tame the beast and then it’s gone! DEPRESSING!
5. mess in the laundry – I don’t know what it is about laundries, but when you move you’ll never find anything as gross. I am believer that’s where dust bunnies go to chew on carrots and you’re socks that go missing. Everyone knows where ever rodents and bunnies are, there’s MESS!
6. cleaning the oven – I HATE cleaning ovens the most. Look at all of that fiddly crap you have to get your paws around. If you have OCD, it drives you to mental unstableness to make it perfect and make sure you have touched and scrubbed every millimeter and made is shiny.
7. chords – WHERE DO THEY COME FROM?! They mutate and grow 2 cm’s each week they are plugged in! For some reason, looking at wires and chords everywhere gives me the SHITS! I literally look at them and lose my temper. Gawd and then when you have to stick everything back into the box it originally came in so you can store it for moving, you have to try and cram all those shitty chords into the box. IT NEVER WORKS! You can NEVER stick the object and chords into the box in the Styrofoam casing it came in! I just can’t tolerate chords and wires!
8. uglyness – seeeee what happens?! You have to stick everything in boxes including the bed skirt or valance or whatever it’s called. It makes your bed ugly! I DETEST ugly beds!
9. the shite you find – I don’t know why it is, but I always find things I have no idea how they got into my unit. Take for example the glass below. I mean where the f**k did I get that?! AND WHY?!
10. finally my MOST HATED THING…. PACKING BOXES! – I HATE THEM! I hate putting them together, I hate pulling them apart, I hate paying $7 each for them, I hate having to drag them home, blaaargh. I have moved so many times it should take me no longer than 40 minutes to pack an entire 1 bedroom unit. I find though, the more times I move, the more time I spend pissing about and dribbling my way around a unit staring at the walls. I don’t know why because my clothes etc don’t live on the walls, but I tend to spend HOURS and DAY shuffling around staring at the walls when I’m trying to pack them. It’s kind of fun when you actually locate something to stick in them though – it’s like building a leggo building inside a box.
So anyhoooo now everything is nearly squished into boxes. I have booked Mr Furniture Removal, Mr Take the Rubbish Away, Mr Steam Clean the Floor, Ms Book Me An Apartment in Sydney and all I have to do is talk to Mr Flight Centre to buy my plane ticket. The only other thing I have to do is come to terms with what’s not fitting in my bag! Such a little bag… so many prizes I want to take with me!
So that bag is where I’ll be living for the next forever. It’s kind of liberating and yet strange about having nothing in life but a bag. No house, no where to go, just you and you’re bag. Chantal (my ex-hooker friend) was always bouncing around the world with nothing but a bag. I kind of thought it was a cool way to live and she had a great philosophy and head space around it all. At least there won’t be any Laundry Dust Bunnies in there – frig I do however have a hair dryer, hair straightening thingy, electric razor and chargers for different gizmos in there though (hooker necessities)…. hmmm seems there is no escaping CHORDS AND WIRES IN LIFE! AAARGH!!!!
See you in Sydney people’s 🙂
ps. MadameX, those Vet gloves only come in the clear plastic 😦 I have looked everywhere for black or red arm pit high gloves and can’t get them anywhere. I have spoken to a hair dresser who had some high ones in black and they were a great thickness and were washable (not that I’d wash them, but thought it was cool anyway)! Those Vet gloves are not fitted to the hand shape and are way to large for my hand, but I wear 3 – 5 latex gloves over the top anyway (stops the scratching of finger nails and way useful to be able to rip one off if you need to use your hand and it’s just been up someone’s bot bot and then you need to quickly stick it back up someone’s bot bot – nothing worse than having to pull on and off gloves at times hehehee). You can get vet gloves that have a neck strap / shoulder strap on them so they can be haltered around your neck so they don’t fall down.
I’ll keep searching and if I can find any, I’ll let you know – those Vet gloves only cost me $30 and there’s 100 in the box 🙂
Take care lovely lady 🙂
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