Lucy Blake's Weblog

Heart Attack in a Massage Parlor

So has anyone ever wondered what happens when someone has a heart attack in a massage parlour? I can tell you what has happened to me when someone had a heart attack while I was on the mission in a massage parlour.

It was a massage parlour at Eastwood – the one that is up the stairs on top of the Butcher. I always thought it was quite cute at the door that lead to the stairs up to the massage parlour they had a flag sticking out of the wall that says ‘meat market’ hahaaa. Anyhoooo

So I was with a man who would have been about 70 or more. For some reason I find men who I would think would not pick me always do. If I was trying the industry for the first time if I was a guy I would never pick someone like me. I think I’m scarey or at the very least I have been told often Im edgey but newbies keep picking me. So anyway it was this gents first adventure in the industry at the age of 70. We were both horrified he had left it so long to develop such a fine addiction so we both decided it would be a good idea to make up for lost time.

Soooo we started with a back massage and body slide. I am to short so can never massage from the side of the table. I have to do everything from on top of the table from the massage to the bodysliding to the happy ending (I have twice nearly taken my head off with fans attached to the roof when I stand up to turn around). We began with the back massage. I then move onto the bodyslide. At this stage I realise he is not looking in the mirror!!! HORRIFIED I was! Fancy not realising to look in the mirrors. I told him to look in the mirrors to which he responded he didn’t realise there were mirrors in the room as he didnt have his glasses on. So off I hop and fetch his glasses then onto the body slide. I was doing the bodyslide for maybe 3 minutes when he calmly told me he was having a heart attack. Me having heard it all before gave him a kiss on the cheeck and said he was so spunky he was giving me heart palpitations as well. It then took him another few minutes to convince me he really was having a heart attack and not positioning for an extra or two (I didnt do them at the time as I was in a relationship and believed as long as no penetration was performed I wasnt techincally cheating – ahahaa).

I jumped off him and asked him if he had any medication he needed to take. He asked me to get a pill bottle from his pocket which I did, and he put a pill under his tongue. We sat and chatted about Gough Whitlam for a while and got onto what Gough would do in this situation. We then decided he would call an ambulance which we decided if it was good enough for Gough it would be good enough for my client. Not wanting to leave him alone in the room I called the massage parlour from my mobile and asked them to call the ambulance and explain the situation to them. I then advised the gent we should probably get all his stuff together and asked if he felt well enough to get dressed. He told me he wasn’t getting dressed while there was a perfectly good naked woman in the room and he wasnt going to waste this opportunity so he wanted me to keep going until the ambulance arrived. I was quite horrified thinking I would kill this man and I knew from my straight job killing people is not OK as there is to much paper work involved. We eventually settled on back rub with towels as it would allow me to wipe the oil off his skin. He got the mandatory lecture about having to much sun damage on his skin and getting his moles checked at the Doctor.

The ambulance arrived 10 minutes or so later and he said he still had 10 minutes left and asked if they could wait. I informed him the massage parlour would be happy to make his time up to him next time he came in. He was happy with that and agreed to let the ambulance people to start poking at him. I asked the ambulance man what they would tell his family/wife when they went to the hospital. The ambulance man said in situations like this they always tell the family they collapsed while walking down the street as the idea was to preserve life not to make someone better so they could turn aroud and get murdered. Then off to the hospital he went.

He came back in a month later and booked me again. He got his 10 minutes we promised him 🙂

Luuuucy (Haley)

Nurse Lucy to the rescuuuuue!

Nurse Lucy to the rescuuuuue!



2 Comments so far
Leave a comment

OMG, that’s hilarious! You must be quite the lady if a man would risk death for his last 10 minutes with you…

Myself, I’m not sure how well I could handle the situation… although I did complete most of the required EMT training a few (haha) years back, so hopefully it’s still fresh enough in my brain to be useful in such a situation.

Comment by Madame X

Hello there!

I hope you’re keeping well lovely lady 🙂

… yup I am the hostess with the mostess worth dying for! PMSL NOT! But shhhhh don’t tell anyone.

You take care of you and I’m having the happy life and business thoughts for you Madame X


Comment by Lucy Blake

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