Lucy Blake's Weblog


Toy Review: Silicone Jac Off Pad

Hellooooo

Here’s the link:

http://www.eknightdreams.com/jackoffpad.html

jac-off-pad

Its a bargain at $20.00 and the gay boy who works in the ToolShed part time and is a part time sex worker swears by it and tells me it is all the rage at the moment. So I purchased one and here are the facts:  

Packaging: comes in a CD case so you can easily clean and re-store it. Careful though not to close the case if any bits are sticking out or they will get chopped off.

Dimensions :  the pad is basically a sheet of silicone about as thick as two twenty cent pieces stuck together and as large as ummmm ooow you know that pretend dog vomit – its about the size of that. It only just covers my hand and I have a little hand. I would suggest if your hand takes anything larger than a small disposable latex glove, then it is going to be waaaay little in your hand.

Consistancy: The silicone kind of has the same consistancy as a breast implant squished flat. For this reason I found its ideal use to be as a squish ball – you know one of those things you play with when your stressing or bored or thinking really hard. It is smooth on one side and on the other it has little bumps on it. I imagine it is like a flesh light. You can either have a smooth handjob or if you need extra stimulation you can use the studded side.

In practice: to use it is semi technical and best done drunk I imagine (although I dont drink so dont qoute me on that). You need to put lube on one side of it so it is slippery and slides up and down the penis. Thing is if you put the lube on one side and then decided to use the other side, when you flip it over, if you have the lubed side on your hand as soon as you rub with it the pad will fly out of your hand and whack you in the face (DANGER!). So my advice is to get up and wash the lube off the side that is going to be on your hand or you WILL be sorry – yup.

Once you have decided which side to use (and I suggest the studded side), you then have to experiment stroking with it. You have to stroke in a certain way and hold it in a certain way other wise you get no sensation out of it at all.

Round up: my adventure buddy and I had the following experience and thoughts:

it sucks as a sex toy

I think it would be better used if giving yourself a delux handjob. I wanted to use it to increase the stimulation or give a different kind of feel when I was giving a handjob to a guy. Unfortunately because the silicone is quite thick, I couldnt feel how tight I was holding his penis so had no idea if I was doing it to soft or if I was wrenching his penis off.

It is to small in your hand. I couldnt keep hold of the slippery little bugger! it kept on flying out of my hand. Once again this may be different if giving yourself a deluxe handjob but I couldnt see it even then staying stuck especially when the pre-cum is flowing and gets onto the side that needs to remain dry next to your hand. If it was made larger or even better INTO A GLOVE!!! yes that would be waaaaaaaaay better. As it is it is just to small to keep your paws on.

Not enough sensation. It has been reported to me that the guy simply cannot feel it. No matter how hard I stroked, tugged, pulled, got maniacally violent the guy simply could not feel it. It is just to slippery with not enough texture.

It was not personal enough for my liking. Call me cocobananans but I like feeling the warmth and texture in my hand of a penis. Hmmm I suppose the best way to put it is it felt like giving a handjob with a latex glove on – make that 20 layers of latex gloves.

Very easy to destroy. I ripped it to shreds very easily. It comes in a CD case and I closed the case accidentaly with a bit of it hanging out and it got chopped off!! Pffft!

On the plus side: it did have an upside and they were:

Made an excellent squish ball

Made an excellent drinks coaster

Was a laugh to use (well was funny to me but boys have a habit of taking everything soooo seriously and want to know the mechanics of it and must make it work – its like when they are trying to put a piece of Ikea furniture together and their faces scrimple up with concentration and they need to read all the instructions 50 times although they pretend they aren’t, then they get all non laughing when they use it)

Eros:

0/10 – I want my money back. Thoroughly disappointed like I never have been before. Hmm a silicone dress… hmm yes I could see that working, but I think silicone is best left in vibrators and breasts.

Mmwaaah!

Lucy

🙂

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