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Ellooooo People’s 🙂
Soooo today we are off to get made even more beeeeeeeeewtiful than we already are – HA! Yes it is the 3 weekly trip to the torture chamber!! We love the beautician! Actually you guys would LOVE to LOVE my beautician as she is stunning. She’s also English which of course mean she is a devo from hell (not that we have ever spoken about hanky panky or anything).She has the straightest, whitest teeth I have ever ever seen! Anyhooo…
The beautician is on top of a pharmacy and you walk up the stairs (haha of course it is upstairs, everything sex work related is upstairs!) and they are these pink grand kind of stairs. WHen you get to the top there is a reception desk like you would find in a brothel or massage parlour with a cute friendly girl behind it (unlike in most brothels or massage parlours). I am greeted by the chick who sticks pins in people (a service any good dungeon would provide) and she calls my beautician. I always see the same girl (I am her reg hahaaa) cuase she knows just how I like it done and specialises in half hour jobs (heheheee). She always wears black (its coincidentaly also a hookers choice of colors for uniform) and is always immaculate but her hair is always in a cuffaffufle (picture just been fucked look). She walks me into her regular work room (OMG!) where I am instructed to take my clothes off and be comfy (aaaah OMG some more)!
The room is pink. The bed is basically a padded massage table with maroon towels placed on it and a paper sheet where your butt sits. The room also has a big shower in it with massage jets (similar to a spa only standing up). There are candles lit eveywhere but fortunately no bad piped music in the room. I ask her if she knows the whole set up is very brothel and she rolls around the floor laughing histerically (they even have a tacky water fountain and big brown leather lounges in the waiting room!).
Down to the business of pain. First she applies the tint for eyelashes which means I am blind with a mask ove my face (hmmmm sounds familiar), then she gets me to open my legs. The wax she applies is pink to match the decor of the room. It can vary in temperature from warm to burny hot. I like it both ways. There is nothing like having waxed ripped off your bagina. No way to explain it besides OOOOUUUUUCH! However sometimes it drips down over your clitoris which can feel quite lovely, actually the only way to describe that feeling is YUUUUUUM. You kind of want to ask her to do it again but of course you cant because you cant let her know you are a bigger maniac than she thinks you already are. While we are doing this we are chatting about her boyfriend and boys in general. At this point I think about you lovely boys and think to ask a few common questions I hear.
I asked her if she would ever wax boys and she said NO WAY. Apparently most beauticians will not do men as they find mens genitals revolting. She tells me this as she is taking tweezers and spreading my naughty bits apart to get at anything she missed. I tell her I think baginas are waaay grosser and she disagrees with passion. I then asked the next most frequently thought boys thought and asked if she was doing a boy and he offered her an extra $500 to give him a handjob what would she do. You dont want to know her answer. I then asked her what she would do if a woman asked her for extras and she thought that was equally as hilarious as me telling her she works in a brothel in disguise – hmmmm I was right not to ask her to drip the wax on my clit again!
Bagina done and its on to the eyebrows. Eyebrows are a walk in the park. THen it’s onto taking the tint off the eyelashes. It comes off by her rinsing it off with water and a cotton bud. When she takes it all off she takes to the floor again and rolls around laughing some more as she has accidentaly put the tint all under my eye on the skin so it looks like I have a black eye and/or I am in depserate need of some sleep.
Then its paying time!! Hmmm this is actually the only unbrothel like thing of the entire experience – you dont have to pay upfront! We discuss the pros and cons of paying upfront and decide it is waaaay easier for them to charge for extras and get them if they dont get people to pay until the end – aaaaaaah how devious of them and men think sex workers are bad!!
Ooow and then they give me a discount because I am much loved 🙂 and they only charge me by the time I am in the room rather than the services they provide me (it ROCKS being a reg hahaaa) and then they give me a little red wrapped up present. I decide I think the present would be bollocks and I like the look of it waaay better wrapped up so I havent unwrapped it yet. Then we all sing a song together and I skip down the stairs and WOOOOSHKA away.
Hmmm now I have written this I feel it is only right to give it the ratings you would any establishment and brothel like experience:
Eros 2/10 (they get the 2 for the wax running over my naughty bit and I kind of like the pain of the waxing and she is very good at infliciting the pain at the very least)
Overall experience 10/10
services provided 10/10
boobs ?/? (didnt actually see if anyone had any)
smoker 0/10 (they are all ‘my body is my temple’ woman)
cleanliness of rooms 9/10 (air conditioning units need dusting)
towels 7/10 (soft but not given one and a bit thready)
ambience 10/10 (no piped music, candles and decor good colors)
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